The daily digest of Twin Cities culture | Secrets of the City

The first few times I attended the Minnesota State Fair as a kid I found it disappointing. It seemed a little run-down, old-fashioned, and the rides were more rickety (and scary) than all the shiny new stuff at Valleyfair. Plus, I have never liked crowds. Somehow, though, that changed when I became a teenager. Maybe it was just more fun to go with friends than family, but I think the real key was a major discovery: ironic enjoyment.

Before anyone calls Sarah Palin a bitch, let me just say she opened the door when she compared her "hockey mom" persona to a pit bull. Hey, if the lipstick fits.

By special guest Defenstrator correspondent, Max Ross. You may know him from such fine pieces as "Protest Music for the New Millenium" and "American Idle - Achin' Aiken - [Insert Pun]."

Why are the media even here?

Hockey moms across the nation collectively ovulated in sheer rapture Wednesday night at the coming of their messiah. Palin's pointed attacks on Obama were justified and applauded by "political speech experts" for their use of humor. The awkwardly-executed humor was the type you're supposed to laugh at, like when the postman tries to make small talk.

Let me start off by saying, I'm not a particularly political person. I care, don't get me wrong, but I just prefer to do what I do best, staying in the pretty bubble of art, music and what-have-you. I am an A+E Editor, after all, not a political commentator! I rarely watch TV, but when I do I often assume it's an extra-violent news day, even though deep down I know that's the way the world is, and I subsequently shut it out of my mind.

After popping into PetSmart for a new dog tag and Home Depot for some new levelers, I head right next door to the Doubletree Park Place in St. Louis Park. How convenient! My plan is to catch a ride to the Xcel Energy Center with whatever delegation happens to be staying there. It turns out to be the Georgians, and they've taken to referring to their quarters as "The Georgia Hotel." I like their sense of claimstaking.

Not yet near the doors of the Minneapolis Convention Center Sunday night and I am already handed Republican swag, in the form of a DVD. This DVD "as seen on CNN and FOX News" depicts on its cover the iconic image of a radical Islam toddler wielding a rifle. I politely put it in my purse as if I sincerely plan on watching.

With a few novels under his belt, Minneapolis literatus Bart Schneider tackles a type of local mystery fiction that swings somewhere between the present and the future...the very, very near future.

Located on a hellish strip of University Avenue in St. Paul, the utilitarian structure sports the name of the candidate - a name which sparks equal amounts of love, hatred and a lot of stuff in between. The drab walls within, like those for any campaign headquarters, are sprinkled here and there with images of the contender, whose mug, for over thirty years, has graced TV screens, movie screens, book covers, placards, post cards, and, yes, perhaps, even mugs.