I am WAY behind on shopping. I know I've been writing out gift guides for y'all, but that doesn't mean that I'm surrounded with foodies in my real life. I have to buy Bionicles [1] and Restoration Hardware [2] tchotchkes like the rest of you.

But I generally hate shopping. The only way I can suffer the hours of bumping into other people, sweating into my winter coat as I stand in line, and the dearth of endless can-I-help-yous from holiday retail associates is to know that in the end I'll be fed.

I'm the most focused when I shop alone, and find dining alone most rewarding. Sitting at the bar of a restaurant, you're generally not bugged by other people, your bartender is always right in front of you, and it can be a beautiful, solitary moment when it's just you and your food. The right places will read your mood and engage or retreat as dictated.

This is my potential week:

If I have to go to Southdale, and fight the good fight of the mall crowds, I'm planning on ending up at Via [3]. I might have to fight for a space at the bar, but the tomato arugula salad and prosciutto flat bread are worth it.

My Uptown trip will include Paper Source [4] and the Shoe Zoo [5], which means I'll be very close to Lucia's [6]. The lack of a real bar might force this into a mid-day lunch trip which means snacking on crepes at a little table in the corner of Lucia's Take-Home [7]. BONUS: I can buy a giant loaf of artisan bread and bring it home for dinner, double Santa!

Nordeast means Surdyk's [10], Bibelot [11], Pacifier [12], and Let's Cook [13]. A big trip like that may deserve a treat at The Red Stag [14], though I haven't tried them out yet. A safer bet, depending on my mood, would be a juicy burger at The Bulldog [15].

Downtown, post-Macy's [16], post-parade, post-Juut [17]treatment (a girl's gotta treat herself sometimes), I'd head to Bank [18]. Quiet and majestic, their service is spot-on.

Grand Ave has more than enough shopping to make me dizzy, but Golden Fig [19] will be my main stop. If I stop at Penzey's [20] as well, I'll be called into Tavern on Grand [21] by a cold beer and a basket of fried walleye. I am powerless in this instance.

I refuse to go to Hugedale [22].

I do have one shopping date scheduled with a BFF for last minute digging on Christmas Eve. We're planning to head to 50th/France sometime in the morning and just see how it all plays out. I'm pretty sure there will be a glass of wine at Beaujo's [23] and potentially another at Salut [24] a few hours later.

At that point, the tree should be stocked and my gullet properly tuned to appreciate the next week's home-cooking-athon.