The daily digest of Twin Cities culture | Secrets of the City

increase your dik size
penile enlargement

Clearly, the word has leaked out: I do not have a large penis. It's true. But do I really need to be reminded every day by numerous emails? The initial sting aside, it's quite touching (hands off, buddy!) to have countless strangers out there so terribly concerned about my sex life.

Every day I check my email at work only to be reminded of my apparent failure to fully exploit the fabulous art of sex — proving, once again, how rewarding work can truly be. It goes something like this:

i'd be scared too if my dick was that small http://www.icmbd.com/

Great! One more thing to fear. Now I really won't sleep (which means I'll probably stay up and write more inane posts).

M
Eager to spend this holiday season like never before?
Get ready for something particular on New Year!
A

Don't be scared to change your life-style!
I
Celebrate the New Year's day with a new bigger phallus!
Keep in mind all our special offers! Check the details now!

Reads rather like an E.E. Cummings poem, don't you think? Ok. He would have done away with the exclamation points.

Pen!s enlargement p!ll
MegaDik may give you a perfect idea!
Enlarge your male stick, and your New Year holidays will be hot and full of great s'e_x!

I'd like a job with the marketing firm that chose that name. Please.

Don't feel shy of your instrument size
All you have to do is just put to use our machine enlargement.
Your sexual life will change promptly.
http://www.carmsda.com

Machine enlagement: It stretches. It pulls. It twists and turns. And at the end of the day your cock will be seriously swollen and your sex life will indeed change. And, yes, you will indeed be fucked. (Excuse the vulgarity, but what can you expect from a post like this?)

You Dont please with your male organ size.
Women joke at you.
Now you can to solve this problem.
Try our male machine enlargemen:t and Chicks will love you sure enough.
I changed my sexual life. Now it is your turn.
http://tofinoinfo.com

Well, at least they're acknowledging that I'm a man.

The contemporary version of writing on the bathroom wall... You go, girl!

compliments criscordova
I had it five times last night thanks to \/i/\gra http://followoperate.com
Jake Cronin

Compliments? Shit, Martha had it eight times; I must be losing my touch.

Deep impressions are in store for you!
Experience the freedom of inching away! <http://hagitec.com/>

Inching away? How deep can you go in reverse? (Guess we should leave that one to vita.mn's sex columnist.)

deep penetration contributes to achieving an orgasm of Design Patterns http://www.tuffsched.com

Hmmm... I always thought sex and acid didn't quite mix, but I guess I was wrong.

oh yes, intercourse is alot better now
http://www.tuibgirl.com
a book, you want a book, you want

Now this I can relate to, but what man would understand?

This is one of my favorites, of course:

Yes, it's true: fake orgasms humilate. In fact, made up words often humilate, too.

Ok. Got to go. Got to check my email.