The Science of Sleep, 2006. Written and directed by Michel Gondry. Starring Gael Garcia Bernal, Charlotte Gainsbourg, Alain Chabat, Miou-Moiu, and Emma de Caunes.
Now showing at the Uptown Theater.
Hello class, my name is Mr. Fresno and I’m your substitute for today. What do we have here–this is Health Education? You guys are, what… 13, 14? Sophomores? OK… they tell me this is a sex education class, but I’m assuming you guys know the biological score, yes? You in the back row, pull those out of your ear and turn off that iPod! What I have to say is important, and then you can watch this movie called The Science of Sleep. This lovely thing is about being in love with someone–something you cats probably don’t know shit about. This freaking little gem is about how you boys can win the love of a woman, and for you girls, it is about what you should demand from your man. It’s sexy–you kids wouldn’t know sexy if I locked you in a room with P.J. Harvey. Watch this movie and you will. The Science of Sleep will not be sunny and have a sugary ending like those J-Lo crapfests, but it will be mysterious and bizarre and painful, which is really what love is all about. And anyone my age should know.
The Science of Sleep is about a young man, a hunk to you girls, this fellow named Gael Garcia Bernal. You may remember him from Y Tu Mama Tambien, a film that every high-schooler should see–especially boys. Girls too: listen, if you can’t get a one of these lunks to go down on you, then don’t let him into your pants. If I could get every teenager to follow that advice we’d certainly have a lot less ‘accidents’, if you know what I mean. Anyway, The Science of Sleep is about young Stephane, returned from Mexico to visit his mother in Paris. He is a fabulous artist, a real crazy dude, whose dreams quite often follow him into the day. On his first morning in Paris, he meets the new girl next door, Stephanie, played by the ravishing Charlotte Gainsbourg. Unfortunately for this lug, he is at first attracted to her friend Zoe. When he overhears Zoe suggest that the landlady (his mother) is a bitch, he decides to lie about living next door, which is a great comic twist. Soon, he realizes that it is Stephanie who is his true love, although his subconscious thwarts this by making him sleepwalk naked in the night, slipping a note under Stephanie’s door that concludes by asking for Zoe’s number. See, Stephane–that’s the hunky boy, pay attention!–has such powerful dreams they interfere with his daily life. He loves Stephanie, but can’t quite figure out if Stephanie loves him or not, and he’s too chickenshit to really find out. So what does he do? Anyone? You there in the back row… well, no, he doesn’t bust her cherry. Damn, you kids these days, no respect. Boy, you’re on the short track to a lousy marriage, let me tell you.
Now I want you kids to pay close attention to Ms. Gainsbourgh. See, the guy, Bernal, is a typical Hollywood-style hunk. He’s ripped, nice face, be around for a long time. But the girl is simply beautiful. Here’s a picture of her, pass it around, but you better give that son of a bitch back or I’ll kill you. You can see she’s not some Jessica Alba-type you young studs typically appreciate. But Gainsbourg, lovely Charlotte, probably can’t find a decent job in Hollywood because she’s not conventional enough. In the movie she even acknowledges having less-than-ample breasts, though any man would give a pirate’s fortune to be acquainted with them. Excuse me for saying that: anyway, Stephane still falls in love with her, despite her not looking like a starlet, and wants to make love to her badly. Because–pay attention!–she is beautiful and this movie is about lovemaking instead of raging sex. This actually happens in real life! Men falling for women who don’t look like Chalize Theron! Charlotte has wit and strength and anger, and she’s got beautiful legs and that face… well, kids, that’s beauty. Boys, look around you. There are Charlottes walking everywhere around you. There aren’t too many J-Lo’s. One’s real, the other’s plastic.
And no, guys, there’s no nudity. Well, I take that back: you get to see Bernal’s ass. Calm down, girls, it’s brief. I don’t have a clue why it’s rated R.
Listen: So Stephane tries to talk with Stephanie, and tap into her intelligence. He knows that being with her will be a challenge, that his own powerful imagination will grow by mingling with hers. But the poor sap blunders along the way, many times. In fact, and there’s so many miscommunications between them, you wonder if they will ever get together. Sound familiar, kids? If not, that means you have never tasted the bitter draught that is a serious relationship. See, both are artists, and the artist is a temperamental soul, children. Both seem to communicate with each other in a way that is very special, with little gestures that do not go unnoticed, with each person feeding the other the best parts of themselves, saving some for later, actually, to use a silly old term, wooing one another. On the other hand, they also pay close attention to each other’s every move, cautiously, so as to protect their own hearts. She doesn’t want a boyfriend; he does not want to be rejected.
This movie is a charmer! That’s right, charm! You know, being yourself and encouraging the best in one other! Ladies, young women, please, pay close attention: Stephanie is not bug-eyed over this guy because of his crazy little tricks and his dashing looks. A guy’ll do that to you every time, show off, look like he’s a genius and then bam! Once he’s got you, it’s back to being a jerk. I see you nodding, you know I’m right. Well, Stephanie doesn’t let him walk all over her, doesn’t let him have all the magic tricks–she’s got quite a few of her own, thank you. And soon he’s reeling.
Stephane’s a crazy character. He’s someone who can barely hold a job for the dreamworld he’s stuck in. Stephanie clearly loves him, but she wants him to stop being such a dip. He’s terribly confused, cries easily, doesn’t know what he wants. Give him this: he’s persistent. And his dreams are too cool to ignore.
The Science of Sleep gives you cellophane streaming out of kitchen faucets, gives you cardboard cars and trains, and wacky little toys that jump and play on their own. But that’s just the tobasco in the Bloody Mary, kids: the real substance, the liquor if you will, is the characters. Stephane, Stephanie, Zoe, the lascivious Guy… like life, it is the people who make the day shine.
The Science of Sleep will teach you how to make nervous small talk when you meet someone new. It will instruct you on the value of friendship and conversation. A man throws his television into the river, a great lesson for all you tubeheads. Guess what? It also shows you how to party, how to treat your mother, how to be bold and how to retreat. The Science of Sleep proves there’s still imagination in the world. You could almost make this movie yourself from stuff laying around your McMansions–its special effects are cheap and contain more imagination in one frame than Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, and Narnia thrown together.
Look, guys, if you can just slow down for a moment, pay attention and let a movie soak into your brain, let it be this one. The person who wrote it and directed did so with love in his heart. Michael Gondry has an imagination and he trusts that you do, too. Trust is good, right? You kids get sick of the fact that no one trusts you with the car, with a credit card, with booze–this Gondry guy, he trusts you’ll get him. I think he made this movie for everyone, but especially people your age. He wants to give you a roadmap through this treacherous time in your life. He wants to show you something beautiful, to do for you what the movies did for generations before Star Wars and Shrek ruined everything. Some movies are meant to waste two hours of your time, give you an excuse for greasy popcorn and a cheap date. Sure, it’s often good that you get a break from having to actually talk for two hours. But this one’ll shut you up, too… but it will make your heart quicken and you might just look over to your date and see the silver reflecting off their face, their reaction in the dark. And afterward, you might talk, really talk, and good things will happen. Jesus, if I had this movie to win the heart of that Laura girl back in the day, I’d probably have three kids by now. But forget that: The Science of Sleep might just make you look around in wonder at this awful planet, and realize that it is good to be vulnerable, and that it takes two hearts to endure. Michael Gondry made this movie because he cares about his audience! He loves you.
You! Please turn out that light. Thanks. That’s enough talk. Enjoy the The Science of Sleep, kids, let its beauty and humor and wisdom feed you for the next couple of hours. At your age, you need all the love you can get.
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