Year: 2006

  • Their Grandparent's Waltz

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    Sweet Land
    , 2006. Written and directed by Ali Selim. Starring Elizabeth Reaser, Tim Guinee, Alan Cumming, John Heard, Alex Kingston, Ned Beatty, Lois Smith, Patrick Heusinger, and Stephen Pelinski.

    Now showing at the Edina Cinema (and a few others around the Twin Cities).

    Someday I’ll be wise and watch movies like Sweet Land when they actually arrive at our theaters, and not months later. Maybe I’ll even review them in good time, in the hopes that my meager words will convince someone to avoid such highbrow garbage like The Good German and turn to this little movie. For Sweet Land is an absolute joy. Just as a bite of fresh bread reminds us of flavor and the blessings of wheat, salt, water and heat, then Sweet Land reminds us, visually, what it is to fall slowly and deeply in love, of the power of friendship and community, of hard work and of the world that surrounds us. Amazingly, the filmmaker, Ali Salim, read Will Wheaton’s short story “A Gravestone Made of Wheat”, fell in love with it, but decided to make a real movie out of the tale, and not some narrated silver screen reenactment. He eschewed moving his production to a distant land, choosing instead to stay in the story’s locale, where his talented cast and crew could walk the farmlands of our flat state, their footsteps heavy with the rich mud. Selim has an eye for people who struggle and fall in love under dark, late-summer clouds, framed by stalks of dry corn. If you seek a picture to make you experience such emotions, if you are aching to encounter a work of art that will remind you of life and its abundant, though small, pleasures, if you’re hoping for movie that has all the surprise of an old picture falling from the family bible, then Sweet Land is your movie.

    It is the story of a young woman, Inge (Elizabeth Reaser, just stellar), who comes to rural Minnesota to meet and marry Olaf (a handsome Tim Guinee), a Norwegian farmer. Unfortunately for the both of them, she cannot locate her immigration papers, and, even worse, is part German. This is especially troubling in the wake of World War I, and the community, mostly from Nordway, and with their uptight ways, dislike the German peoples, often wondering, aloud, if she’ll try to spread subversiveness, or even prostitution to their quiet hamlet.

    The town pastor (John Heard) will not allow a wedding to take place; the girl will have to sleep at a friend of Olaf’s, Frandsen. Frandsen (Alan Cummings) is a friendly, child-like fellow, another farmer, saddled with debts, but wth the treasure of a lovely wife and nine fine children. Inge quickly grows tired of sleeping at Frandsen’s place, amongst his wife Brownie (Alex Kingston) and in a bed with the nine kids, sharing bathtubs and shoving feet out of her face each night in bed. So she steals away to live at Olaf’s house, walking across the midnight fields beneath buzzing Northern Lights to take a private bath in Olaf’s kitchen. After all, they would be betrothed were it not for the pesky preacher and the prejudices of the community. They agree that, in the interest of propriety, he’ll sleep in the barn while she takes his room. And makes him breakfast and strong coffee. Which gets the bees buzzing in the townsfolk’s collective bonnet.

    There’s not much more than this in Sweet Land. For the Good Lord’s sake, it is an especial pleasure to see a film with great acting, beautiful photography, and strong sense of its story. Selim has tremendous confidence in both his story and his audience, avoiding beating us to death with excessive crane shots and a soundtrack to force us to feel. Moments of great gravity are left for us to figure out: Inge and Olaf clearing his many dozen acres of corn is shot with a simple camera style, the long, empty furrows reaching out to a distant horizon behind the two, who are nothing more than filthy and happy with their triumph. I shudder to think what a ‘greater’ director would do, say, Terrence Malick or Spielberg. Undoubtedly, one would drown us in sunsets, the other sugarcoat that scene with a John Williams score and an edgy camera (not to mention a boatload of sweet-faced urchins). Selim’s film moves patiently, building the subplots with the care of a farmer trying to coax his beans to grow in a hot summer, his characters flexing their personalities without distracting from the considerable tension. At times cliches spring up–there’s a subplot involving a banker busting a farmer’s land for a past-due mortgage–but the people in this film respond strangely, as people do, to these crises, looking irritated as twists of fate interrupt their lives and loves and concerns, and then moving on. History is present but doesn’t turn into a lecture–there’s a socialist, the first tractor, responses to the War to End All Wars, but in each instance they are skillfully weaved into a plot whose sole concern is to illuminate the lives of these fascinating people. Lovely.

    Sweet Land is being touted locally and in Los Angeles, where it is filling theaters to the rafters. I was surrounded by eager patrons, most of whom were elderly, including a lady who couldn’t stop grunting and groaning at the action that unfolded, irritated, say, by the things a banker said, or someone’s inability to make a good cup of coffee. Sweet Land is a movie made by decent people for us decent people–a movie that does not patronize like local don Garrison Keillor and his “above average” Lutherans from Wobegon. Here, Selim chooses to allow struggles to define his characters, and if there’s a joke, they’re in on it as well. Where Keillor is cynical and distant, Selim is hopeful, real, and empathetic. Perhaps that is why its immigration message is so appealing to the Hispanics of Los Angeles, who are also seeing this film in droves. Sweet Land is specific to Minnesota, it is a story of farmers and Norwegians and Germans. But it is also the story of immigrants, the story of the struggle to make life work, and resonates to every one of us who has ever walked beneath a stormy sky, who has ever ached for a good dinner made by a loving hand, or has fallen into a frustrating love that might go unrequited for whatever circumstance. And with its close, of Olaf and Inge waltzing on a perfect summer’s day, you might just find yourself thanking your lucky stars for Sweet Land, for your own memories, and for the lovely magic of your friends, family, and the one you love. I ask you: What more do you want in a movie?

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  • Let the Slaughter Begin …

    According to conventional mythology a new blog is born every second, each with an average readership of … one. I hope to do better than that, if only for the sake of Rake publisher, Tom Bartel, who, after months of brutal negotiations has finally consented to attach my idle, crackpot meanderings to his otherwise sober-minded publication … and who also owns a lot of guns.

    My primary concern here is much the same as it was for the 15 years I played media reporter/critic at the St. Paul Pioneer Press. At its’ most basic it is this: Who is manipulating who, how and why? Not only is the influence of media pervasive and inescapable in modern America, it is in

    a state of furious flux. Much of the so-called mainstream media, TV networks, daily newspapers and radio empires is suffering from their Faustian bargain with their investors. They’ve diminished the integrity and relevancy of their products, substituting — in my humble opinion — a lot of knucklehead pandering, also known as bullshit — for truth, accuracy and information useful to sustaining better lives and common culture. Very ironically, a lot of this heavily researched “entertainment” and “news” is also humorless and ponderously self-important. Come on folks, there is a happier medium, somewhere between giddy celebrity worship and homogenized, risk-averse corporate-speak.

    In case you wonder, I owe the title of this blog, “Lambert to the Slaughter”, to local media luminary, Tim Sherno, whose name, (as I read the notarized memo he sent), “is synonomous in the Twin Cities market with Edward R. Murrow, William O. Douglas and John C. Holmes.”

    The implications of sale of the Star Tribune, the new found reverence for the wisdom of Gerald Ford, and the visuals of the last minutes of Saddam Hussein are all topics I’ll get to before the banks open again on Tuesday.

  • Foolish Wishes, Resolutions, Etc.

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    To surface each morning already grasping for every precious scrap of consciousness.

    To dance and blow bubbles and reach instinctively for the brightest colors in the crayon box.

    To creep through bushes and fling yourself at the world.

    To howl and holler and feel the grass between your toes.

    To move forward.

    To lunge.

    To leap.

    To stomp through the calendar, oblivious.

    To laugh uncontrollably, and cry uncle.

    To acknowledge that the place you live remains a foreign country, almost wholly unexplored.

    To see all around you entire new constellations and vast galaxies teeming with possibility.

    To have pure idiot wonder and faith in the limitless miracles of your body.

    To trust fully the things on which you can depend.

    To harbor none but exaggerated fears and the smallest of dissolving terrors.

    To be hungry for nothing but something to eat.

    To be forever trusting in the arms of mercy.

    To, once you stand and run, never crawl again.

    To recognize that you are blessed beyond measure, and to accept your blessings as the expected, everyday miracles that they are.

    To reach out.

    To raise your voice.

    To bite your tongue.

    To listen.

    To hear voices.

    To change your mind.

    To hold out hope, as a gift, as an offering.

    To hold on.

    To let go.

    To be there.

    To wave the white flag, victorious.

    To embrace with gratitude your gifts and opportunities.

    To spend time at the bottom of every day with your inventory of pleasures and fond memories.

    To give yourself away.

    To know that you’ve done what you could.

    To be at peace.

    To sleep and –not merely perchance– to dream.

    Sweet dreams.

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  • Reservations

    New Year’s Eve sucks! If only because a) you cannot safely drive anywhere that night because there are so many drunks on the road and b) after one measly cocktail, you cannot safely drive anywhere that night because there are so many cops on the road. But it’s our lofty expectations that really spoil the night. So far in our scavenging for the perfect New Year’s plans, the boyfriend and I haven’t found anything that fits our fancies. Of course, pegging the right plans is impossible when you’ve got both a snob and a booze-hounding, but babelicious, Average Joe to please. We had been considering the party some of my friends are going to, which is in a gallery above Lurcat. But the Evite provided a link to Flickr.com, which had photos from last year’s happening. All the men were dancing with their shirts off; the women were not. Boyfriend winced and suggested we go to the beer bash in his high school buddy’s New Brighton garage. Nope!

    Here are some other options:

    If you want to be in the company of naughty people
    New Year’s Eve In Heaven. This event is brought to you by Vox Medusa, the very folks who sponsored that famous Nudes party at Jeune Lune a few years back. Through personal connections (I worked at Jeune Lune at the time), I was able to lineup a gig bartending at their party. It all started out just fine–nude performance art and aerialists performing with their shirts off. But, from my perspective, things quickly went south, with every farm-fed blonde having striped off her shirt by 11 p.m. My personal favorite was the gorgeous 18-year-old dancer who, I presume, was performing somewhere about the building that night. He repeatedly made trips to the bar to purchase Red Bull. On his last visit, while waving his left hand in the air, revealing the big, red I’m-not-allowed-to-drink X marked there, and looking directly at me, he asked when the barstaff would be undressing.

    Swanky people
    Que Fiesta! A Five Star New Year’s Eve Party. This is The Rake’s very own throwback event, with dancing to the Volare Loung Orchestra, martinis, champagne, poker, and more. You’re supposed to go all-out; get dressed up.

    Standing-in-place-nodding-their-heads-to-the-beat people
    Mark Mallman is playing the Varsity, and his guests are Vicious Vicious and Solid Gold.

    Single people
    Can you tell I’m getting tired of this? From what I understand, my friend Bridgette has met a single man or two at the annual International Market Square party. To sweeten the pot, The New Congress, which is one of The Rake’s favorite bands, is playing the party this year. I must admit however, that things haven’t worked out between Bridgette and these men. The guy she’s currently dating was met at the gym, which brings us, full circle, to our prospects for January 1. Happy New Year!

  • Conversations Real and Imagined: Coffee House Critics Weigh In

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    “I don’t quite get it–Apocalypto is about Iraq and George W.? When? Bush is cutting the heads off liberals? The Blue Man group? Jaguar Paw is Barack Obama? The Spaniards are the Islamic terrorists?

    “If Gibson weren’t such an unholy square, I’d say he was smoking some pretty serious shit if that’s what you get out of that mess. I mean, holy living shit, you’re really putting a lot of meaning inside a guy getting his head cut off…”

    “So I heard that Children of Men is about the future, man, when women can’t have babies, you know, but Clive Owen is this guy who figures out, by getting blitzed on this strawberry ganja, how to get preggers himself. So that’s what the title’s gigging on, you know, men having wombs, men having babies, and the whole freakin’ society goes gay, man. Shit, I don’t know who the hell would wanta see something like that…”

    Happy Feet. I’m telling you, what is it with these penguins? They’re ubiquitous. March of the Penguins, Madagascar, now this. And I guess Happy Feet’s as much of a polemic as An Inconvenient Truth. Maybe if Al Gore dressed up like a penguin, he’d be the President!”

    “Yeah, I took Mom to see The Nativity Story. Who would have thought the life of Christ could be so boring!”

    “That was so awesome! In Casino Royale, Bond plays Texas Hold ’em. I play Texas Hold ‘Em, man! And ‘member, ‘member when we were playing for a case the other night, and I won, man, and the guy betting, what’s his name, didn’t have the case or the money for the case, shit, that was just like that La Chiffon guy from the movie. Awesome! I’m like James Bond, man!”

    “Don’t care if it’s the book, that awful old cartoon or this new movie–which isn’t so bad. Charlotte’s Web will make me cry and cry and cry, always and forever. And I’m so glad that there’s something in this life that still moves me enough to cry…”

    “Jennifer Hudson deserves an Oscar for Dreamgirls. The girl is fat, and us fat girls need heroes with Oscars. She was beautiful, a beautiful fat girl, and what happens to her is awful, just because she’s fat. So she better win. I think that would be good for fat people.”

    “No one understands Almodovar. That’s why his movies never make any money outside of New York. And I have to say that sometimes I see one of his movies when I’m not in Manhattan, and you know what, I really don’t get them. It’s like you gotta be in a big city, with the whores and gays and trannies to understand. This Midwestern city life just isn’t attuned to his stuff.”

    Good German. Good Shephard. Having seen both, I’ll tell you that I’m starting to wonder if a movie has the word ‘good’ in the title, it means exactly the opposite…”

    Rocky Balboa? Rocky Balboa? You want to have a nice dinner and see Rocky Balboa. Really? You know, maybe it’s time we should have a talk about where this relationship is going…”

  • The Lightness of Being In Space

    Tonight, the Bell Museum’s Science on Screen series features State of Weightlessness, a 1994 documentary that pairs archival footage of early Soviet space travel with the reflections of various cosmonauts on being in Space. Our friend Colin Covert likes it very much.

  • Verbosity with Plum Sauce

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    Haven’t had enough of three hour menu presentations by effete servers describing specialties that become more and more intricate as chefs plumb the dark recesses of their creativity?

    Visit Chez Louise and refresh the page to get more more more.

    Or if you seem to be the only one lacking a good comment at your next wine soiree, go ahead and arm yourself.

  • Go Pack Go

    A trip to Lambeau field to watch the Vikings play the Packers would be a highlight of the year for any real football fan. I don’t quite fit that level, but with a father that grew up in the U.P. (thus making him a Green Bay fan) I didn’t even realize until I got to college that you can’t really be a fan of both teams. So when offered the chance to go to the game while visiting my girlfriend’s family in Green Bay over Christmas, I jumped at it.

    I had been an avid fan of the Vikings first and Packers second growing up. Not this avid of course, but I did my share of yelling at the T.V. Now though I cherish my free time too much to spend Sundays watching anything except and occasional matinee. So I’m left with catching news and some games while I’m out and about.

    The game was about as ugly as one can imagine. And my one hope of seeing Favre throw seven touchdowns to tie the record didn’t happen. He didn’t even throw one. But Lambeau did not disappoint. Though it rained on and off throughout the game, I had a great time crammed in between some Packer fans and Vikings fans. The rhetoric was suprisingly civil with each side yelling that the other side sucks and each responding “I know”. In the end the Packers pulled out an ugly victory and I had to admit I was a little disappointed even though I had told my girlfriend I was rooting for them. I do hope Favre comes back next year. He’s so close to two records: TDs and INTs.

  • Band of Brothers

    From the moment I met him, which was a couple years ago now, I knew there was something familiar about my Rakish coworker Brad Zellar. He looked an awful lot like the musician Martin Zellar, the guy my high school friends used to follow around to beer bashes and the Taste of Minnesota concerts. It occurred to me sometime later: these two talented fellows even share a last name. Hmpf. In any case, Martin Zellar is gigging in beautiful Excelsior, Minnesota this evening. This strikes me as another of those mirthful most-wonderful-time-of-the-year entertainment offerings, although, as far as I know, the show’s not expressly holiday-themed.

  • Soda Pop And A Piss In The Woods

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    There were four of them in the car. Three of them were crammed in beside each other in the front seat, drowsy and cursing intermittently and squinting into the harsh sunrise that was splattering off a windshield already made bleary with insect grease. At some point in the night they had run themselves through a hatch in some damp, low country.

    Lester Chardonay, who was seldom in a mood to brook opposition, was stretched across the back seat, laboring fitfully at sleep. From time to time he would sit up and glare with the others at the new day rising towards them down the highway.

    Lester Chardonay was full of words.

    “Smite and quench, boys,” he said. “Smite and quench.”

    “When you put the instruments of might in the hands of them that’s right,” he said, “no injustice shall go unpunished.”

    “And you shall bring his gray head down with blood to Sheol,” he said.

    Lester Chardonay’s enthusiasm for some vague revenge, coupled with a long night of drinking, had resulted in the present excursion, an adventure which sunlight and uneasy sobriety were making less and less explicable to the men in the automobile’s front seat.

    “I’ve never known you to leave town, Lester,” the driver said, craning his head around to address Lester in the back seat. “How come is it that you’ve come to grief with this fella clear out here?”

    “Shut that thick head of yours and drive, you pea-brained son-of-a-bitch,” Lester said.

    “Lester,” one of the other men said. “We was drunk. This here has become a labor, and a good piece of travel as well. Speaking for myself, I was expected this morning at the mill.”

    “Gob Pritchett will kiss my ass if he has a word to say about it,” Lester said. “That mill ain’t a damn thing but gerbils on wheels.”

    They drove then in silence until the sun was up out of their eyes.

    “Pull over there alongside of them woods,” Lester said. “I intend to go back in there to do what a man does standing up that requires of a woman a crouch. I suspect the rest of you may need relieving as well.”

    The other three men followed Lester Chardonay across the road, down into a ditch, and back into a wooded lot.

    “Whether or not this is something that will enrich the soil is not a thing I am likely to know,” Lester said.

    “This here is an awful nice place,” one of the other men said, smiling for Lester’s approval, which was not forthcoming. “I imagine there’s a creature or two living out here.”

    One of the party went off in another direction, kicking around in the leaves. He let out a whoop. “Well I’ll be damned if there ain’t a bathtub right out here in the woods,” he said.

    Lester Chardonay nodded his head and pawed at the steaming leaves with his boot. “Some was sure enough living here when this world was a better place and a man was free to shoot whatever moved through his land that didn’t belong.”

    “That so, Lester?” one of the men asked.

    Lester stared the man down, his jaw popping beneath his ears. “Get your sorry asses back in that car,” he said. “Before every last one of you follows my piss into this very ground.”

    The three men hustled ahead of Lester Chardonay and piled back into the front seat of the car.

    Later in the morning one of the men in the front seat spoke up. “Lester, I’d sure like to stop for a can of soda pop.”

    “That’s a reasonable request,” Lester said, and issued an order: “Stop this here car at the first place you see along the road that has bottles of soda pop. I am thirsty as the devil himself for a can of Coca Cola.”

    When they had stopped a short time later, and were standing around the car stretching and drinking their soda, Lester Chardonay made this announcement: “Many times in my long life the devil has appeared to me as a horseman, taunting me with this errand undone. Up the road a piece, near the next town over, is a snake of a fella who once upon a time gave my mama a bastard child, and put my old man in such a state that life was no use without too much liquor. That good man drunk himself into the earth howling, and my mama, as you may know, went off all those many years ago to live with that child I never did see. This here man is the man that done that awful thing to my life, and I intend to boil the meat from his skull and use it for a piss cup.”

    “Aw, Lester!” one of the men said, screwing up his face.

    “Mister!” Lester Chardonay shouted, turning on the man with a trembling index finger. “If you ain’t got the stomach for justice, you best stay on right here, because we sure as shit didn’t come this long way for a soda pop and a piss in the woods.”

    “I can’t kill a man, Lester,” the driver of the car said.

    “Then you are going to watch a man who can,” Lester Chardonay said.

    They took a gravel road off the highway and drove a mile or so to a place all alone at the end of a lane, a dirt yard with a chained dog, and an old camper covered from top to bottom with bumper stickers.

    “Holy smokes,” one of the men in the front seat said. “It looks like this fella’s been everywhere.”

    “Not yet, he ain’t,” Lester said. “You all just watch.” He leaned up over the front seat and glared in the direction of the camper. “Ain’t there one of you sorry bastards gonna help old Lester Chardonay send this fella on his way?”

    The men in the front seat stared straight ahead. An old man appeared at the front door of the camper and stepped out onto the porch. He squinted out at the car parked there in his yard.

    “He’s an old fella,” one of the men said. “And awful damn skinny. I don’t think you ought to do it, Lester. It don’t seem right. That there’s an old man.”

    Lester Chardonay sputtered and turned red. “You cowardly sons of bitches,” he said, and sprung from the backseat.

    The old man took a step forward from the porch and leaned a bit toward the visitor in his yard. “Yes?” he said.

    The men in the car heard two shots, and saw the old man pitch forward from the top step of the porch. The dog let out a howl and scrambled to the end of its chain, where it jerked mightily and collapsed in the dirt. It regained its feet and crawled away beneath the camper. Lester Chardonay shouted something the other men in the car could not hear.

    One of the other men reluctantly helped Lester Chardonay dispose of the old man’s body in a cistern out behind the camper.

    Back in the car Lester Chardonay said, “You can’t tell me this world knows the difference one way or the other.”

    The three men in the front seat were hunched towards home, squinting into the sun that was now burning down on them from directly above.

    “Let’s just see what the devil has to say now,” Lester Chardonay said.